Description of the Questionnaire

The “Our Relationship” Questionnaire (Couples Relating to Each Other Questionnaire – CREOQ) is a specialized assessment tool designed to evaluate the interpersonal dynamics within a couple’s relationship. Developed by John Birtchnell, it is grounded in Relating Theory. The tool consists of four distinct forms: the man’s self-assessment, the woman’s self-assessment, the man’s evaluation of his partner, and the woman’s evaluation of her partner. Each form contains 96 statements that assess styles of relating based on eight core interpersonal dimensions. The questionnaire places particular emphasis on negative forms of relating, although each scale also includes two positive items to help control for defensive responding.

Purpose

The primary aim of the questionnaire is to identify patterns of negative relating between partners. By completing the items, tensions, power dynamics, distancing behaviors, or excessive closeness that may affect the relationship are brought to light. The tool is especially useful in therapeutic contexts, as it provides counselors or psychotherapists with a structured overview of the interpersonal architecture of the couple’s relationship. At the same time, it offers an opportunity for introspection and increased self-awareness for both partners.

Data Analysis and Use

The 96 items are distributed across eight distinct scales, each representing a particular direction of negative interpersonal relating based on the interpersonal octagon model. These dimensions include dominance, cold control, detachment, passivity, clinging, compliance, affectless control, and pseudo-intimacy. Responses are rated using a four-point Likert scale, from “never” to “always.” Scores are calculated for each scale and can be graphically represented. This analysis enables the comparison between self-perceptions and perceptions of the partner, thereby revealing either alignment or divergence in how each individual experiences the relationship. The resulting data may be used for both research purposes and therapeutic guidance.

Scoring

Scoring involves calculating the frequency of responses corresponding to negative items for each of the eight dimensions. Positive items, although included in the questionnaire, are not counted in the final score; instead, they function as validity checks to monitor response reliability. The higher the score in a given scale, the more prevalent that particular negative relating pattern is. Full analysis can be carried out using spreadsheet software or specialized scoring programs, which allow for visual representations of results in circular or linear diagrams. This graphical profile makes the shape and intensity of interpersonal dynamics within the couple more tangible, thereby facilitating the formulation of targeted interventions.

References

Birtchnell, J., Falkowski, A., & Steffert, B. (2006). Measuring interrelating within couples: The Couple’s Relating to Each Other Questionnaires (CREOQ). Psychology and Psychotherapy: Theory, Research and Practice, 79, 403–418.
Birtchnell, J. (1993). How humans relate: A new interpersonal theory. London: Praeger.
Birtchnell, J. (2002). Relating in psychotherapy: The application of a new theory. London: Praeger.
Harnagea, C. (2011). Couple interrelating and attachment in psychotherapy. Doctoral Dissertation, City University London.
Birtchnell, J., et al. (2016). The CREOQ3: A brief version of the Couple’s Relating Questionnaire validated in Greek. ResearchGate Publication.